What’s The Episode About…
In this episode, I’m about to share with you a guide on how to build your own community for whatever your purpose is, because if one thing is certain in this entrepreneurial life is that, you need to start connecting with others, so stick around and let’s find out how to do it together.
It doesn’t matter in what point of your life you hear this, it is always hard to reach out for others and open up to strangers. But, if you’re looking for that magic shift or that supporting energy that makes you feel empowered to create something bigger than yourself, you are going to need a community that provides you not just support, but also other important things like feedback, courage, empathy and so much more.
Find out what happens when women start showing up for each other when you finally start feeling part of your own sisterhood and make that, part of your business plan.
Key points discussed:
- Finding your lost sisterhood, how to start connecting with other women (03:04)
- Getting rid of the mean girl society, leaving toxic people behind (04:19)
- Step 1: What is the very first move in finding your cycle? (7:04)
- Step 2: Keeping committed to your community (7:28)
- The Camp Elevate Facebook Group experience (12:45)
- Start your own in-person mastermind group (17:54)
Learn More About The Content Discussed…
Join the Camp Elevate private group: http://thecampelevategroup.com
Subscribe to the podcast on Apple, Spotify, Google, or your favorite app!
When Did It Air…
October 8, 2019
Episode Transcript…
The Transcript Is Auto-Generated And May Contain Spelling And Grammar Errors
Hey friends. Alright. Do you remember a time when you felt so supported, surrounded by a sisterhood or surrounded by that group of friends, whether it was at a summer camp in a sorority, maybe it’s when you were playing sports? There is something cool that really happens when we’re aligned with a group and some people call it a tribe, a clan, a community, and really when I think about the best gifts I’ve been given on this journey of being an entrepreneur and even my journey, well before that I call it my EIT entrepreneur in training, it has been all about that supportive sisterhood. So my friend Susanna price, who’s over in camp elevate on Facebook in the show notes below, I want you to join us there because it is such a badass group of women that are supporting each other daily. She wrote this quote, the circle of women around us.
We’ve invisible nets of love that carry us when we are weak and sing with us when we are strong. I’ve got to figure out who said that quote and give credit, but I started to think about this episode today and for those of you that are listening and you’re solopreneurs, maybe you’re building from your phone in between calls from your regular job or maybe you’re just like thinking is this all there is like it’s okay to not be fulfilled with being that mom and be in that wife or be in that single mom and I used to have all this guilt around. I knew I was made for more. I knew I wanted more connection, I wanted to have a bigger impact. I would practice the big speech on stage in my car before I even had a business and my daughter said to me one day, McKenzie said to me one day, but everything was good.
Everything’s good. Like, tell me why you wanted to push to do what you did. And like she was in high school at the time and I, all I could say to her was how you feel when your, when she did acting and was a big part of the theatre program when she was in high school, you know how you feel when it all comes together and they did this cool thing where they would stand and they would pray and they would sing this beautiful song and I still watch videos and I cry and like the big crying mess. And it wasn’t necessarily about the talent, the show who got which part at the end of the day I said to her, it’s about that accomplishment that you together as a team, as a group, you did this big thing and we always need that in life. That we’re doing this big thing.
And it may be that you’re totally fulfilled in that mom role if you’re a mom. But I speak to a lot of women and I am that woman who at 47 years old was looking down the path and saying, my kids don’t need me so much anymore. They’re getting in the Jetta and they’re driving off to school. And I needed to find my voice. And I also love making money because money allows freedom, which brings experiences. And that is what I’m all about, as you know. So let’s talk about that community and what you may be needing and seeking. Maybe you already have it, but I want to talk about what happens when women show up for each other and when they feel that supportive sisterhood and how you can seek it out and find it and be a part of it and make it and create it and make it a part of your business plan.
Okay? So think back, I want you to make a list of, as I said at the beginning of the podcast of the times when you felt the most connected and the times when you felt the most alone. Where were you in your life? Were you disconnected from a family member? Did you have a falling out with a best friend? When did you feel the most alone and when did you feel the most connected? And if you’re a leader in the industry that whatever you’re building, um, if you are just someone in a neighborhood that just ha, you know, maybe you just had a baby and you’re feeling alone and disconnected. It is what happens is when we’re surrounded by community, that’s how we thrive you guys. And so let’s talk about building the communities as entrepreneurs, as women on a mission as women making an impact where you can find one, how you can build one and how that is going to help you to build this beyond your wildest dreams.
So first of all, I believe that when women show up for each other, magical things happen and they’ve gotta be the right woman, there is no place cut it out of jealousy, of talking behind someone’s back of not celebrating success. If you’re in a circle and in a group where there are screenshots taking place of, look what she did, look what she’s doing. And if those people are bugging you because they’re the one up the one-up friend, I’m doing it better than you get rid of it. You get to decide. By all means. We are beyond having to sit at the lunch table with the mean girl and where are the clothes that she wants us to wear that we did in seventh grade. All right, so you get to decide your circle. That is number one, decide the circle and get rid of the toxic people and get rid of the people that make you feel like crap.
That’s number one. You’re a big girl. We’re adults. Most of you are over 40 we get to decide that circle. So if they’re supportive, if they’re celebrating with you, if, if you can talk about your fears without feeling like you’re being judged. If you can talk about success and they’re bringing the champagne to your house and if when you’re running into a roadblock, they’re offering solutions and strategies and you get to mastermind together even better. So what happens when you don’t have that circle? How do you find it? And that is what I’m going to tell you the next piece of advice. So think about this. What ha like the Peloton. My sister Karen is like a hundred. We got this Peloton versus soul cycle thing in our family because my daughter is a soul cycle fanatic. She’s worked there, she’s connected. I love that she found her circle at soul cycle.
What a healthy way to meet people. And she’s met some of her very best friends. I don’t know if they’re listening, but cat and sky and McKenzie, um, I hope they’re listening because you know, I’m kinda that dorky mom that my, my voice, my audience is like totally different than the millennial cool people and they’re so cool. So if you’re listening, thanks for loving my girl. So I want to talk about what happened with Mackenzie when she walked into that soul cycle studio. So she walks on in, it was brave you guys, she had just, we just dropped her off in New York City. She was going to theatre school. That was going to be her thing. That was her dream. She thought, and you know what? We change our dreams a million times and that’s okay. But just that one brave move of wanting to be a part of something new.
So number one to find your circle, you’ve got to make a brave move. We were dropping her off and she hadn’t been, she did a couple of classes of cycle classes here in Wellington and something clicked that she’s like, I want to figure this out. And so she signed up and she walked into the soul cycle and that was brave. And so first of all, taking that brave step to walk in making a commitment. Number two, continue to show up in the community. Show up, talk, connect, ask questions. If you’re looking for fitness, like McKenzie was looking for fitness and really she found mindset. She found motivation, she found connections. She actually expanded beyond what she was doing in college and found a new, a new passion for what she thinks she wants to do with her life because of the supportive sisterhood and the challenges and that feeling of accomplishing together.
So be brave and then engage in the community. Don’t just sit in the back of the room and you might be thinking, well I build a business online. I’m going to talk about how to find those online communities. But I think that that the groups when you think about how people fit in and how they feel empowered, these are important ideas and lessons. Let other groups, okay, sororities, hi in college, high school band, high school theatre, all those things are built-in. They build community into those things and then we grow up. Maybe you had babies and you had a playgroup and you had the preschool moms and the engagement at school. Or maybe you don’t have kids, so you’ve got to find other communities. My sister Karen, remember we talked soul cycle Peloton. She’s found a huge community in Peloton. She is a such a hard-working corporate has, I mean she travels and does international tax like she is so and so good at what she does, but that group, her professional community wasn’t filling and fueling what she needed in terms of her fitness goals and just the community around Peloton.
So she’s in all these Facebook groups and this is what she did is she started showing up in the Facebook groups and she started contributing. And she’s also one of the very, very best cheerleaders I know. So she’s sharing for these other women. Next thing you know, she’s becoming like one of the administrators of the group. And then she went beyond it and found when they were doing the in-person meetups in New York City, she does those meetups. So what happens is she’s found her community. She’s found that tribe, they cheer for each other, they show up for each other. She gets on that damn bike daily that doesn’t move and doesn’t go anywhere because they’re depending on her. And because she’s got that community for accountability, but also to celebrate. And that is what life is all about, right? Remember what I said, when women show up for each other, a shift happens.
We create incredible communities. It’s all in my intro, what I talk about. And when we have this community and this support, we start to say, what if, how about, how does this sound? All right? So if you’re following me, what are your communities that you have become a part of? Is it Bible study at church? Is it for me? I had this awesome playgroup of young moms when, when our babies were babies. Um, I have always, always, always go back to my tennis community. When I moved to Florida, I had a great tennis group in Michigan and I was feeling disconnected. I’d started homeschooling the kids. I was not a very good homeschooler. That was definitely an outsourced thing. I was good at homeschooling if it was around me having fun. So McKenzie will say to me, maybe we should do math today.
And I was like, Oh yeah, we got to do that thing. So this is not a podcast about how to be a good homeschool mom, but although I wouldn’t trade those three years for anything, and that’s another reason to have a flexible, flexible job, right, and be your own boss. But yeah, what I want to say is I was missing the connection and comradery and sisterhood and tennis have always been that thing. And I joined a tennis team. I met some of like, I think it was over a decade ago that I walked on the tennis court and it was like the Kenzie walking into soul cycle. I didn’t know anybody at that time. I was feeling a little bit uncomfortable in the tennis clothes I had, I had really cycled into some Finnish nighttime eating stuff that who knows, like that’s, it was just where I was and this is what made the big difference.
So my friend Jessica, who has now become a really good friend, she was the captain of the, and she got my name and you guys, I was like 40 years old or maybe, yeah, it was 40 years old when this happened. And I get this phone call and she’s like, Hey, it’s Jessica. I just wanted to tell you how excited and happy we are that you are going to be joining us this year on our team. We can’t wait to meet you practices blahbidy blob. I made the bold move, but what made it so great was the women that met me with open arms. So if you are looking to invite people into your circle and to transfer this over to business, we create a lot of communities within Facebook groups, going to events, mastermind groups, all of those things. Be that person that’s inviting be that person that reaches out, asks questions, supports, cheer somebody on.
And if you’re in a Facebook community and someone used to be there all the time and they’re no longer showing up and you notice it, why don’t you reach out and say, Hey, is everything okay? Okay? So let’s talk about how to find groups. If you are looking at building a business online or your entrepreneurial journey, you’re feeling stuck. You’re feeling like I’m sitting and scrolling and I don’t have anybody to talk to, to support, to give strategies. So Facebook has amazing, incredible communities. Okay? So I happened to have, um, a really, really cool group. It’s called the camp elevate groups. So it’s camp elevate and you can find it at the camp, elevate group.com. If that’s for you. We don’t just talk about marketing and sales in that group. We do today. Um, we did a challenge of what’s one hard thing that you’re gonna commit to doing today?
And we challenge each other. We have campfires because my big mission as you know is to create the supportive sisterhood where I can connect you with all of the pieces where I may not know how to build out the most awesome tech at E tech funnel that does blah, blah, blah. That might not be how you build, how I’m building my business. I do have people helping me with like an opt-in freebie so that I can stay in touch with my group, but I always will be that one to connect you to those people. A lot of the interviews I have that we do, we have Amber on regularly. We have Kristen on regularly that talk about getting beyond the deserve level, how to bring meditation and awareness into your life. I’m never going to pose as the guru of all things, but I am the master connector.
If somebody is out there doing it, I’m going to find them and I’m going to bring them into camp or bring them onto the podcast and so if you want to check out that group, see if it’s for you, see if that’s your circle. You can find the link in the show notes below. And we do a lot of, I do a lot of beta testing and there are programs that I’m about to launch in, in some of my paid stuff. And so we just hang out. We have campfires, we support each other, we celebrate with each other. And we also bring in some really cool specialists that work with those people that are looking to build their own business, be their own boss, all about your content, your conversations, your conversions, your connections, all of those things. So another place that you can find groups are paid mastermind groups, coaching groups, and even paid challenges.
I have been the queen of signing up for things, paying for things, and then sitting in the back row because I don’t do the work and it gets overwhelming. So make sure that when you decide, when you take the step, and I know a ton of really great masterminds, a ton of great coaches out there, and I have had the honor and pleasure of being a part of some amazing and awesome groups. Like when I went to Greece with Danelle Delgado that Greece through, we’re still on the messenger chat together. That community, the friendships, that was like pivotal for me on my journey. Also, some of you that are listening, maybe building in the network marketing model and that is why so many people come to network marketing and stay is because they feel that that sisterhood, that community. Some teams have it, some teams don’t.
If you’re a network marketing leader, the very best thing that you can do is create and cultivate the culture because I am going to tell you that 90% of the people stick around because of the friendships, because of the community and because of that sisterhood or brotherhood that’s built. So that’s just a side note and me, and that’s one of the things that I’m really good at is building community because I spent my life as a camp counselor and I still love to think I’m the camp counselor this week. I’m headed with to a leadership retreat that I am leading and I get to hang out with 10 women that are coming to learn mindset. We’re doing vision boards, we’re making a plan. We’re talking about, we’re talking about their daily action plan, how they can take big steps and big leaps in their businesses. We’re spending four days together.
And what happens when those things come together is you always meet someone that can become, and this is the next step. Find an accountability partner. Find someone that will show up for you and then vice versa. You show up for them. So joining some of the free groups, the other pieces, you guys, this is huge. Create your own mastermind in your community. My friend Rob Sperry told me that he did this and they commit to it. So look at some women that you think would fit well together. And this is about taking the bold step. Okay? And I’m going to challenge you to find the Facebook group. Come on over and join ours. Start your own Facebook group. I’m going to be doing training coming up about how to start your own community to share your message and have your platform and create your own sisterhood.
Don’t worry, I’ll give you all the goods on that. I’ll actually be announcing that over in the group or just DM me on Instagram if you want on that somebody things are being launched. You can also go to BethHoldenGraves.com and you can see what the offers are on there. But what I want to talk to you about is the last thing I’m going to encourage you to do because I think we as entrepreneurs that build online, some of you build offline, we spend way too much time behind the computer screen. So I am going to encourage you because every move that we make that creates the sisterhood that helps change a life that’s helped support someone that so needs us today. That’s how we make an impact. So I am going to encourage you, just start your own in-person mastermind group, sisterhood or gathering and if it’s business that you want to build, look for some people.
Are there other network marketers in your area? Are there people that are life coaches? Are there people that are their friends that are realtors and find a common mission that brings you together? Like, just don’t just say, Hey, we’re going to have lunch. Talk about, we’re going to, maybe you’re going to do a goal setting, a vision board party, but I encourage you to organize it. Invite 10 people. You don’t have to pay for it. Meet in a restaurant, meet in a park and make sure that everybody has common things. If they’re young moms, maybe you bring the kids along. Maybe you’re looking, you’re an almost empty nester. You’re an empty nester and you’re lonely and you’re sad and you don’t know what to do. Because like if you’re making Brussels sprouts for two now instead of trying to get, you know, tend to eat the Brussels sprouts, create a community of the people that have the same need as you and commit to showing up.
Commit to sharing content. Um, what I’m gonna offer to you guys today is to find in the show notes, I have a link that is to the campus elevate group.com that is going to take you over to the Facebook community that I’m talking about. And inside of the units. Inside of that group, you’re going to find how to start your own mastermind, your own community within your community, some steps to doing that. You can create an event Brite all of the things, and I want to also encourage you because if you’re listening, if you are in a group and we’re going to start this in camp elevate to also share the wealth that one day a week you all decide how are we going to share our time and resources? Who can we help? Who can we serve? Because I believe that a community is only so good as the people that you serve, the people that you help.
It’s not all about how can I connect and how can I make money? When that’s out there, it just turns into like an icky spiral and it turns into that hustle and grind and build the funnel and get the list and get them sold and get them sold. Like that’s just gross, right? So I am so excited that you if you’ve stayed on until the end, thank you. Screenshot this podcast. Put me up in your stories on Instagram. Shoot me a DM, find me on, and I would like to ask you this today. Did you go to summer camp and if you did, like what are your favorite memories or are you involved in groups? Now I want to hear from you about your groups, what have been your best experiences with them and if you’re having trouble finding a community, a group, a mastermind, reach out to me and asked me that as well because I’ve got so many resources and connections out there that if my group isn’t for you or if I can’t serve you, I am going to connect you with someone who can. I will catch you next time. Remember, you’re not the boss and I say it over and over so that you can remember that you are in charge of your own destiny. You are one decision away.